Venting

Ok, so I'm just gonna vent for a few since I have no need to watch my words, or mind who's around when I'm on here. My son has a non existent sperm donor. We separated when he was only a year old and he hasn't tried at all to be in his life. I've driven 10 hours to meet him for him to not show up, I never deny him visitation, and would like for him to be in my son's life. I learned from my parents to not talk smack about him to my son, because god knows the complex that gave me as a child. He claims to love him yet seems just to call at 1 in the morning drunk off his ass and doesn't even ask about him. So, anyway, today I get a letter in the mail that the courts in his state think that his child support payment should be $56 a month!!! He doesn't have to pay for the last 10 years of his life either. I filed the claim 9 years ago. How is this right? The kicker was that the monthly portion for health care is $2. I pay almost $400 a month for medical coverage and his portion is $2? Wtf is that gonna do for him? Buy a toothbrush? Sometimes I think I shouldn't of even put his name on the birth certificate. I so wanted to have a cookie cutter family, and yea, I was really wrong. I am pretty happy with my life right now except for those moments when he calls or I get a court letter and it brings all my feelings back to the surface. I just want for my son to have good relationships. Thanks for listening.